Last Updated: February 2017

The privacy stuff below covers both the Qme app (Android and iOS) as well as the www.askqme.com website.

We don't like it when our stuff* ends up on the internet without our consent.

We don't even like it when our stuff gets used without our consent (often to make someone else money). That's why Qme was designed with some magic dust to make sure everything that touches the app goes exactly where you want it to and does not end up plastered over the darkweb. That said, the internet is evolving all the time. Security is not perfect - we just have to do the absolute best we can and use proper tools that safeguard your stuff.

When we first started building Qme we knew that it would have to be built from the ground up with solid privacy stuff. That goes beyond encryption and security - it actually needs to be part of the way all of your data is handled and stored. There have even been a few times when we hit a roadblock and were presented with options which would have meant handing over our user data to make life easier. We have never taken that road and never will.

This privacy policy holds no tricks or secrets (sorry). It is simply an explanation of everything we have done to secure your data. It should be read with our End User Licence Agreement (that thing you probably just tapped yes to when you downloaded Qme from the Apple App Store orGoogle Play Store). Trust us, it is fun reading and has almost as much sex appeal as 50 Shades of Grey.

Here are the basics: there is the stuff we collect about you (your name, your Facebook identifier), there is fun stuff you upload to Qme (photos, questions) and then there is some other stuff that gets collected as part of ensuring we can run Qme and fix up any issues quickly (city location, app version number). Arguably, some of this stuff isn't 'personal data' or 'personal information' (in a legal sense), but it doesn't really matter to us - we commit ourselves to dealing with everything you upload and send as though it is.

Let's get this out of the way upfront: for the purposes of this sick piece of legislation called the Data Protection Act 1998, Qme Interactive Limited (yep, that's us) is called a "data controller". It might sound dystopian, but it basically means that we are in control of your stuff. We don't want anyone else to be in control of your stuff. In fact, if we screw up, it means that we will be on the hook and can't offload responsibility onto someone else.

You can write to us to complain if we do screw up (our address is 20-22 Wenlock Road, London, England, N1 7GU), but to be honest it's way easier to just email us at privacy@askqme.com (plus, snail mail takes ages to actually get to us and we want to fix any issues quickly).

STUFF WE COLLECT FROM YOU

We apologise in advance for how basic this is. We have committed to being completely transparent. We take this so seriously that twice a year we have transparent dress up night (yes, we know what you are thinking about now, you sick bastard).

Stuff you send us - filling in forms, sending us an email. Surprisingly, this often contains your stuff. Your name? Yep, that's your stuff. Hold onto it. Your address? Again, that's your stuff. If you put it in something you send us, and it is your own personal stuff, then, yes, we get that stuff.

Stuff we get from Facebook - we use a Facebook API to log you in and hook you up with your mates. What do we get from Facebook? Not much and we only get what we absolutely need to make Qme work - your name, your unique Facebook identifier (wait, what the hellis that? Answer: Facebook reduces everyone to a number. Depressing, right?), and the list of your mates. We could get other stuff (maybe your birthday, your likes and dislikes, all that other fun stuff), but we don't need it, so to hell with it. Basically, if you say no to the Facebook pop up nothing is going to work. Well, that's not true, you will be able to ask questions to the three robot monkeys, but all the fun stuff with your friends can't happen.

Stuff we get from your device - your device is like a broadcast ninja. It sends so much stuff out that it's surprising everybody doesn't get stalked. We get your device screen size (because, dude, we need to know which version of the app you need and if it screws up we need to know what needs to be fixed), OS version number (and won't judge you if you haven't updated for three years), Qme version number (c'mon dude, update already! There's more cool stuff in each version). There's some other boring stuff that your device sends us so we can troubleshoot stuff (such as the MAC address, some network information, location by city), but this is seriously just to make sure we can work out if there are any screw-ups on our part.

Stuff you send on Qme - let's make this really clear. We use Qme. We use Qme for lots of things. Some things we don't want people to know about. Some stuff could get us into a lot of trouble (as individuals, not the company). So we don't want anyone having even a remote chance of getting a hold of the stuff we are sending to our mates (photos, questions, answers). The result is that stuff gets deleted from our server after 72 hours. It does not matter who sent it, what it is or what anyone else does, this stuff disappears. So if you sent a picture of [CENSORED] with your mate's [CENSORED] with a [CENSORED] and a [CENSORED] at precisely midnight tonight, then 72 hours later that stuff is gone from our server. We can't retrieve it, so don't ask us to. We couldn't even if we wanted to. Want to keep it? Screenshot it. You will see a timer letting you know how long before the message self-destructs.

Other stuff - to be honest, we don't ask anyone else for anything about you. But, our lawyers told us we might get this stuff at some point and we want to make it really clear: if we get anything from anyone else and it relates to you, we will make sure that they give as much of a hoot about privacy as us.

WHAT WE DO WITH YOUR STUFF

Literally, our only goal in getting your stuff is to make sure you can send that stuff to your friends. We do not disclose any of your stuff to anyone else (unless a legal authority tells us we need to, in which case we have no choice - BUT we will let you know as soon as we can and take all the measures in our power to challenge such an order). Although we are a small team, we work with a bunch of cool people (designers, developers, even some other companies helping us do cool stuff with Qme), so we might use your stuff to help those people do cool stuff too. One thing we might do in the future is create some sick looking aggregated data charts to show how popular Qme is. Maybe this will allow us to earn money and quit our day job (we could get a sponsored question out to certain people maybe?). For the moment, we do not do this, but we could, maybe, so let's flag that upfront.

If we sell Qme (PARTAY!) then we might need to disclose your stuff to the person buying Qme.

STORING YOUR STUFF

We're not going to tell you EXACTLY who we use to store stuff (seriously? We're trying to protect your stuff, so we're not going to tell everyone on the planet where to find it. Hint: Try looking in that "Analytics" folder on your partner's desktop). But, let's put it this way: it's someone really cool who does stuff for government clients and that means the security is really, really tight. Unfortunately that sick person is outside Europe, so your stuff is going to processed outside Europe. In order to use this sick, amazing person's security we need your consent to sending your stuff across to them and store it on their high-tech bomb-proof servers. We make sure they give a hoot like we do about privacy.

Let's put this out there: the internet is a ship with a million holes. As a result, stuff goes wrong. Stuff gets lost. Stuff ends up places. We are using services that are really secure and we pay for the best stuff we can to make sure everything on Qme is über-tight. Data is encrypted and anonymised and your stuff is deleted as soon as we have no need for it.

STUFF YOU CAN DO

If we screw up, tell us.

You have some other important rights as well. For one, if you don't want us to use any of your stuff for marketing, just tell us. We won't be offended. We'll be impressed. Do you know how many people actually tell us not to? Not many.

Lazy option - tell us how we screwed up by emailing privacy@askqme.com.

Long-winded option - send us paper to 20-22 Wenlock Road, London, England, N1 7GU.

LINKS TO OTHER STUFF

If we include a link to someone else's stuff - word of warning - it is not ours. This is usually obvious. Now, if you go there, those people have their own privacy rules dealing with how they handle your stuff. We always check to make sure they haven't got some dodgy hosting plan that will screw your data over, but seriously dude, just be careful - we don't have control over everyone. if you send them your stuff, you'll have to deal with them (we will help as best we can).

ACCESS YOUR STUFF

So, by now you know that WE DO NOT STORE MUCH OF YOUR STUFF AT ALL. But, if there is something we do have, and you want that fixed or destroyed, we will do it (happily :-) ). You have legislative rights to request this - and we can charge you for it (most places do - have a look at their privacy policy) - but for you it will ALWAYS BE FREE.

CHANGING THIS STUFF

If we change this document or what we do with your stuff, we will tell you. Currently, we are only concerned that our lawyers will tell us to replace the profanity in this policy with regular lawyer stuff, but let's hope not.

TELL US HOW COOL OUR PRIVACY POLICY IS

We spent a lot of time on this policy, as you can tell. We even had to make sure it fulfilled the legislative requirements. So if you want to tell us how cool this policy is and that you wish more companies would be this transparent, you can contact us below. Or, you know, because you think we screwed up.

Lazy option - tell us how we screwed up by emailing privacy@askqme.com.

Lond-winded option - send us paper to 20-22 Wenlock Road, London, England, N1 7GU.

*personal data